Bullying is everywhere. And sadly, so are very pathetic anti-bullying messages. No one is going to take a silly anti-bullying commercial on Cartoon Network seriously. But bullying is a serious matter. It can have devastating effects. It's not just gay or effeminate kids in schools getting bullied.
ANYONE for ANY REASON can be a target.
I believe that extreme measures need to be taken to nip this in the bud, which is why I think it would be a good idea to have bullying considered to be a criminal offence. It would also be nice if it could be punished by the death sentence....
To this day, I am still haunted by my past. I had always been a little shy of people, from as long as I can remember. I didn't trust people. So, it came as no surprise to me, that I had always been treated poorly by my peers. At first, it wasn't so bad. In kindergarten I could go up to somebody and say "Can I play with you?" and we'd become friends. Then as children age, they begin to form a hierarchy, more commonly known as the "popular" kids and "non-popular" kids. And later, the "rejects". What is it that differentiates between who becomes "popular" and who becmes a "reject"? To this day, I still do not understand. But I am aware that there are several differences that contribute to this difference. Having gone to a Catholic K-12 Elementary school, this list is based upon my experience, so it may be different for public-schools.
1. Family Status: If you are from a wealthy family, you probably have nicer toys and school supplies. Children from lower-class families, on the other hand, cannot afford as nice uniforms or supplies or even gadgets. I tend to be from the latter. I was never able to have as nice things as the other kids. I honestly didn't mind, and to this day, I still dont mind. But for some goddamn reason, it matters to OTHER kids. If you dont have nice things, they dont give a damn to play with you. Sad, but true.
2. Genetics: If you have a pretty face, people will want to be around you. If you are average, well... sorry, but you're out of luck. It's hypothesized that our preference for beauty is hardwired into our brains. So I guess that sucks for us average girls. Inherited acne? I really feel for you. Children are harsh, cruel demons.
STAID
That word still gives me chills. At least people dont care to remember synonyms anymore. We learned it in our Junior High English class. It means quiet. I became STAID after this lesson. There was a certain boy in particular who would stare at me and say it in a harsh, condescending way. At least being "quiet" sounds relatively positive. But STAID sounds negative, like a disease. I don't know why my peers considered my occasional silence to be "abnormal" and cause for torment. I just didn't see the point in running my mouth 24/7. I only ever spoke up when it was something that needed to be said.
Social interaction is crucial for children to grow and to learn about themselves and others, to form friendships, to become more accepting. If that learning process is taken away because one is exiled from peers, that can have harsh, long-lasting effects on a person. No one ever really told me why they treated me that way, so I was never able to correct myself. I really wish someone would be kind enough to tell me why my life has been a living nightmare ever since 6th grade. And why that nightmare continued into highschool. It was much better in highschool, but I still noticed that it was much harder for me to interact with others. Did I give a bad first impression? Am I physically repulsive? I do not know. I have been left in the dark.
I dont know if I will ever recover from my experience. I feel very happy to give my attention to listen to a friend or my boyfriend's problems or issues, and even to give a shoulder to cry on. Even when I am compassionate to others, it reminds me of my own experiences in hell and brings a fresh searing pain to my wounds. But in the very least, it is soothed knowing that pain like it is shared by someone else. And that I do my best to help others, knowing that there's not a single person on this earth who has not suffered from something.
Aaand... long story short, this is why I wish that one day, the penalty for bullying will be death. I am completely serious. I feel as though I have been emotionally and psychologically tortured. If I knew I would end up this way, I would have beat the living shit out of each one of those kids. Especially the girls. I would have loved to destroy their pretty faces. I hope they grow up to become hookers and die of AIDS. I hope the boys join the army and die in combat.
*Sigh* No, I'm not like them. If they ever came to me asking for help, I'd do it. Because I've learned something. I'm not below them. I'm above them. I am more intelligent than to fall to their petty little social cliques and bullying maneuvers. It doesn't matter if you are born rich or poor, any race of the rainbow, any gender, any sexual orientation, and any other way a person can be different. People all deserve to be treated with kindness and love, and yes, even punishment for when they cause harm to another person. Children need to learn their boundaries, so they can grow into strong, accepting, respectful adults.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Summary of a Jar's wild college spring break
Y'know how movies make a college kid's spring break seem like an awesome party?
Well (fortunately for me, at least) it's not.
Day 1 (Sat): Wanted to go see my Kaab, but he was at stupid LARPing thing (So I moped around all day). T_T
Day 2 (Sun): Hung out with my BFF Lee. Got Pokemon White. ^_^ Too bad that this was the day Kaab came home from LARPing....(Now I had pokemon to fill the void in my heart).
Day 3 (Mon): Went to school with Kaab, wore a backpack to blend in (I felt like a secret agent). Played Pokemon while he was in class, met some of his cool Kaab-ish friends. Had an eye appointment and got part-time glasses prescribed to me (Now I can look like a REAL nerd! :3).
Day 4 (Tues): Ate, slept, and played pokemon.
Day 5 (Wed): Ate, slept, and played pokemon.
Day 6 (Thurs): Ate, slept, and played pokemon. Also went to Olive Garden for dinner (Delicious).
Day 7 (Fri): Had breakfast with Lee at Yokonos (The pancakes tasted funny). Visited my highschool (No one seemed to miss me). Went to a pet store (I now want a robo hamster). Got food poisoning from Yokonos (Damn those pancakes). Spent the rest of the day puking my guts out (From all possible ends). Had to sleep with my hair in a pony tail because I kept having random urges to puke (Now my hair is pretty messed up). My lovely Kaab was kind enough to pet my back and put a bucket next to where I was sleeping (I love him so much). He took such good care of me: getting me water, throwing out my full barf bags, not being grossed out by my explomiting, and probably other stuff but I was so ill and delirious that I can hardly remember that night.
Day 8 (Sat): Spent the day on Kaab's couch, trying desperately to rehydrate myself and eat some food without causing myself to explomit more (I lost 4 pounds in one day. So hurry on in to Yokonos to get yourself the best damn weight loss food out there!) *Note: Please do not actually eat there to lose weight. You will probably become obese.
Day 9 (Sun): Slept in till 11. Ate a little bit of food, then got taken back to college. While I was unpacking my stuff, I had my Soulsilver Pokedex manual in my hands from my backpack to put back on the shelf - I suddenly knew my missing money was in there. And it was (I like to think that I have hypersensitivity - I should trust my body's judgements better, maybe next time I will put down the damn fork after one bite of gross pancake).
And now here I am, alone, possibly still ill, and without my sweet corn on the Kaab. :(
Well (fortunately for me, at least) it's not.
Day 1 (Sat): Wanted to go see my Kaab, but he was at stupid LARPing thing (So I moped around all day). T_T
Day 2 (Sun): Hung out with my BFF Lee. Got Pokemon White. ^_^ Too bad that this was the day Kaab came home from LARPing....(Now I had pokemon to fill the void in my heart).
Day 3 (Mon): Went to school with Kaab, wore a backpack to blend in (I felt like a secret agent). Played Pokemon while he was in class, met some of his cool Kaab-ish friends. Had an eye appointment and got part-time glasses prescribed to me (Now I can look like a REAL nerd! :3).
Day 4 (Tues): Ate, slept, and played pokemon.
Day 5 (Wed): Ate, slept, and played pokemon.
Day 6 (Thurs): Ate, slept, and played pokemon. Also went to Olive Garden for dinner (Delicious).
Day 7 (Fri): Had breakfast with Lee at Yokonos (The pancakes tasted funny). Visited my highschool (No one seemed to miss me). Went to a pet store (I now want a robo hamster). Got food poisoning from Yokonos (Damn those pancakes). Spent the rest of the day puking my guts out (From all possible ends). Had to sleep with my hair in a pony tail because I kept having random urges to puke (Now my hair is pretty messed up). My lovely Kaab was kind enough to pet my back and put a bucket next to where I was sleeping (I love him so much). He took such good care of me: getting me water, throwing out my full barf bags, not being grossed out by my explomiting, and probably other stuff but I was so ill and delirious that I can hardly remember that night.
Day 8 (Sat): Spent the day on Kaab's couch, trying desperately to rehydrate myself and eat some food without causing myself to explomit more (I lost 4 pounds in one day. So hurry on in to Yokonos to get yourself the best damn weight loss food out there!) *Note: Please do not actually eat there to lose weight. You will probably become obese.
Day 9 (Sun): Slept in till 11. Ate a little bit of food, then got taken back to college. While I was unpacking my stuff, I had my Soulsilver Pokedex manual in my hands from my backpack to put back on the shelf - I suddenly knew my missing money was in there. And it was (I like to think that I have hypersensitivity - I should trust my body's judgements better, maybe next time I will put down the damn fork after one bite of gross pancake).
And now here I am, alone, possibly still ill, and without my sweet corn on the Kaab. :(
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Things I've learned from a Kaab
Kaab (pronounced "cob", like corn on the cob) - The male partner to the Jar, also known has her boyfriend. Generally sweet and sensitive and lovable, and yet doesn't always have the most common sense. He has taught me some very valuable lessons that I have been fortunate enough to avoid - and I'll tell you how.
* Always ALWAYS click " Save"
When typing something of some importance, click "save". Do this frequently. Save to multiple locations. So your computer "auto-saves"? Save it. Technology is not dependable. If you make the mistake of not saving, you run the risk of losing your document to the cyber-termites. You will then have to retype the document from memory. You will have to do this even while your girlfriend has already waited hours for you to finish your document the first time. She will have to wait. You will seriously regret your decision not to save. So please, click "Save".
* Plan things AHEAD of time
If you need a ride, call in advance. Do not call after they have already passed your location and arrived home. They will not want to go back to get you unless you have blackmail or food of some sort. Or better yet, get a drivers licence and your own damn car.
When making plans for events, COMMUNICATE with others. Let everyone know what is going on: when, where, who, what, etc. Have things planned to do, but you dont need everything planned out minute by minute. Example: Zombiepocalypse. If everyone knows the plan, you have a better chance of survival. If you fail to communicate, you will have your flesh eaten by a zombie.
*Do not hit a man in his junk
Apparently it really hurts. How would I know? I certainly don't have any of that. I wonder if it's an intentional biological weak-spot?
Also, for the record: It only takes 20 pounds of downwards pressure to rip (or at least significantly tear) to rip off a man's sack. Please, only use on attempting rapists and killers, OK?
The Lessons
* Always ALWAYS click " Save"
When typing something of some importance, click "save". Do this frequently. Save to multiple locations. So your computer "auto-saves"? Save it. Technology is not dependable. If you make the mistake of not saving, you run the risk of losing your document to the cyber-termites. You will then have to retype the document from memory. You will have to do this even while your girlfriend has already waited hours for you to finish your document the first time. She will have to wait. You will seriously regret your decision not to save. So please, click "Save".
* Plan things AHEAD of time
If you need a ride, call in advance. Do not call after they have already passed your location and arrived home. They will not want to go back to get you unless you have blackmail or food of some sort. Or better yet, get a drivers licence and your own damn car.
When making plans for events, COMMUNICATE with others. Let everyone know what is going on: when, where, who, what, etc. Have things planned to do, but you dont need everything planned out minute by minute. Example: Zombiepocalypse. If everyone knows the plan, you have a better chance of survival. If you fail to communicate, you will have your flesh eaten by a zombie.
*Do not hit a man in his junk
Apparently it really hurts. How would I know? I certainly don't have any of that. I wonder if it's an intentional biological weak-spot?
Also, for the record: It only takes 20 pounds of downwards pressure to rip (or at least significantly tear) to rip off a man's sack. Please, only use on attempting rapists and killers, OK?
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