Inspired by the 12 step program for addiction, compulsion, or behavior recovery, I've created my own program of 13 steps towards becoming the person I've always wanted to be, making the most of myself and my talents, and most importantly: being happy. These steps were written by me, for me, or anyone else looking to take control and turn their life around, making positive change.
I've got quite a few friends and family going through some rough times right now, so I hope this proves to be helpful to others as well.
1. First and foremost, know that you [yes YOU] are a person deserving of happiness. Repeat after me, "I will do my best to follow these steps to find happiness."
2. Acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses. Take note of your faults. Now, accept yourself for who you are. Yeah. Do it. No one is perfect.
3. Briefly list and consider your problems, but don't dwell on them. Know that there are things in life that are out of your control, but you can still be in control of your actions and reactions and you CAN do something. We just have to do our best! Ganbatte!
4. Create a list of thought and behavior changes that you want to make. Stick to it. Tell your friends and family about it. Ask them to help you stick to it. Try taking a break from people who encourage some of the behaviors you want to change, at least until you know you've broken the habit. Spend more time with positive influences, people you want to become more like.
5. Before you can change your behavior, you need to change your thoughts. Let go of resentments, regrets, and negative feelings. Life's too short to waste with petty feelings. Focus on positive things. Do NOT ruminate! Every morning think of 3 things you are thankful for.
6. Believe in yourself. Believe in the power of whatever God or gods you believe in. Believe in the power of change.
7. Once you think you've gotten the right mindset, start working on behavioral changes.
8. Don't let fear keep you from achieving your goals. Don't be afraid to act on the positive impulses that come from your new mindfulness. Say hi to the cashier that has your usual breakfast memorized. Compliment the sweater of the cute guy or girl sitting next to you. Put yourself out there.
9. Reward yourself for any improvements made. Make sure the steps you are taking are actually making you feel better about yourself. Celebrate yourself!
10. Enjoy and focus on the present. Plan for the future when necessary, but always remember that you are living in this present moment, right here, and it slips right by before you know it. Remember the past, learn from your mistakes. Also know that most of the time it's never too late to make amends, call an old friend, right a wrong, and to become the person you've always wanted to be.
11. Keep true to yourself and to others. Love the people that have been there for you through this process. Love the people that were there for you when times are good and bad. Know that you are loved and cared about by others! There are even some people out there who truly care about you whether you're a stranger or a close friend. And be there for others too, but only do so with true compassion.
12. If things still seem to be bad or miserable, try repeating any or all of the steps above.
13. Be happy and enjoy life!
This list needs a lot of editing because I feel like it starts off strong and diverges a little bit. Comments and suggestions by the random people who read this are greatly appreciated! It sort of went from self-empowerment to more general stuff for all the people I know going through hard times. It's a rough draft though, and just like me, it'll be polished with time and effort.
Rule 4 should be "Double-Tap"
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